A Cry for Help

 Being one of the most indecisive people alive, it is probably the worse position for me to be in, especially when one side is my mum and the other my sister. Sometimes I feel as if my feelings get stomped on and buried under the ground between these two strong-minded people. Its possible for them to have a full-blown argument regarding me without either of them asking 'how do you feel about this?' before I end up storming out of the room.


 
I am not strong-willed. For me, there are only certain things that actually make me want to wake up in the morning - Love for my mum and lover. Sometimes it does get tough for me to find a reason to not do something stupid, but ultimately I do find a reason and that is my mum. The last thing I ever want to do is to hurt her and disappoint her. What hurts me even more is seeing other people disappoint her and hurting her and not being able to do anything about it. I am not strong enough to stand up to these people and to protect my mum. For this, I want to say sorry. It isn't that I dont want to but I dont want anyone to get hurt because of me or what I say.

The longer I am stuck in this position the harder it gets to breath. But I really dont know what to do when both are my family? How can I live in this world when all I want to do is make everyone happy? Am I really as naive as people say when all I want is to make the people around me happy?